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So, today begins spring break and I couldn't be more excited.
On Thursday, in school, Ethan Zhon, winner of Survivor: Africa, came to my school to talk about his charity, Grassroot Soccer. What he said really inspired me to do what ever I can to make a difference. I already voluenteer at an animal shelter, but I have decided to try to take a larger role in the shelter so that I can try to make changes for the better. Being as young as I am, I feel like I can't make that big of a difference, but I know I can if I try. I also know that if I study hard, I will be able to use my abilities and knowledge to help people and maybe even change the world.
I really want to do as much for this world during my time in it, so I want to start now. My first steps will be small, but look for me in the future when I win the Nobel Prize for erradicating AIDS! :)
I feel like I have a purpose now, the only thing I need to do is to decide which disease I want to work on first...
April 4th, 2008
April 2nd, 2008
I have been feeling reflective lately and it is beginning to get to me. During play practice one day, I took a walk around the auditorium and read all of the plaques on the wall. I noticed that there was a sign commemorating each war from WWII to the present. The notable exception being Iraq. I realized that the missing plaque would be added once the war was over and that it would probably commemorate people that I know. There is already one person that I know over there and it terrifies me to think that there may be more. By the time I come back for my high school reunion, there will be another sign, with more names. I can only pray to any god that will listen that the sign will look like the one from Korea that reads "All returned home safely." And now, my eyes are filling with tears as I think about those serving to defend our country and I hope and pray that this ends soon and that no more blood needs to be shed.
Please, someone, anyone, Bless Our Troops.
Please, someone, anyone, Bless Our Troops.
melancholyMarch 31st, 2008
So, yesterday was the final performance of Peter Pan and I couldn't be happier. I am so tired of all the drama and the bullshit. I just want to go to sleep and not wake up until I am completely rested. It's not that I'm suicidal or any thing, that is NOT what I meant, I am just so tired that I want a full night's rest, but there's a fat chance of that happening. Although, now that the play is over, I am looking forward to having a life again. I want to get out in the world, go shopping, be with friends, and maybe even start dating again; I miss dating and having a constant in my life. Hopefully, a certain someone would pluck up some courage and ask me out. Honestly, I am so old fashioned that I just can't get myself to ask someone out again. I am so afraid of rejection that sometimes, I'm afraid to even talk to him. It's disgusting really...
sleepyMarch 9th, 2008
Last night, as I sat, bored, watching Pride and Prejudice, some strange guy (probably drunk) followed my cousins home from the bowling alley and attempted to break into the house, while they were home. He only succeeded in kicking in the door before the cops arrived, and no one was hurt. Still, that is scary as hell.
So, I've been thinking about the fact that we all may not be as safe as we think we are. My cousins are not from the same lilly-white type of town that I'm from; in fact, they are from more of an "inter-city" type area, but not quite. Despite this, the fact that this could happen to them shakes me to the core.
From this, I have learned that you should never take what you have for granted and no matter how safe you think you are, there is a distinct possibility that it could be ripped, savagely from your hands any second.
Now, I am not saying to become a hermit and live in fear, but to be careful and maybe, every once in a while, throw a glance over your shoulder.
~Pixi~
contemplativeMarch 8th, 2008
I wrote this for an English assignment and posted it on fictionpress... I recieved no response. Please tell me what you think, good or bad.
The Carnival
She wandered along the pier she had known so well as a child. The worn boards led to a carnival that had always been so full of life and joy in days of old. However, as she approached, she noticed that the pier was deserted. Forgotten cups and wrappers littered the scene and bright neon lights illuminated the sky. Despite the glaring lack of human presence, the rides ran as they had so many years ago.
The familiar music of the carousel caught her attention as she wandered over to it. The horses that had once entranced her as a child now looked sad and trapped, forced to travel in the same small circle for eons on end with no deeper meaning than to life than to travel that familiar path. She turned and caught sight of her favorite ride as a child, “The Gravitron.” She used to enjoy the feeling of being stuck against the padding and the struggle to move was exhilarating, but as an adult, just thought of struggling for mobility unnerved her. The dragon-headed roller coaster that had scared her as a young girl was now a laughing matter. She found it amusing that she had once feared something so innocent.
She wandered further down the pier to where the games were located. There had been a time when she would save her allowance for months just so she could try to win a doll that she would play with once. The allure of the games tended to be more exciting than the actual results. Near the games was the fun house. She would spend an hour in there just trying to find a way through the maze. Every time she went to the carnival, she was determined to find a better way through the maze, but she would usually end up in the same situation she had been in the last time: lost.
She gazed upward and saw the mammoth ferris wheel that towered above the pier, its bright lights cutting through the darkening sky. The sheer enormity of the wheel intimidated her, but she knew that it was just another object, traveling along a path that had been set for it, just like all the rest of the carnival attractions, just like so many other things. She grew weary and followed her path, back through the desolate fairgrounds. She traveled back along the worn boards, into the night.
The next morning, she awoke to the sound of her cell phone ringing close to her ear. She had a voicemail from her boyfriend. They had been dating for three and a half years now; she did not see much depth to the relationship, but they continued because it was comfortable; more out of habit than anything else. She showered and began to ready herself for work. She grabbed her coat off the treadmill that sat, folded in the corner of the apartment. It had seemed like a good idea to buy a treadmill and try to stay active, but her purchase never paid off and the piece of equipment stayed in the corner.
She drove along the familiar route to work until she came to her daily decision: Route 23 or 80? Every day she would try to decide which would take her to work faster, but no matter which route she took, she always ended up in traffic, so she took eighty and continued on her way. As she sat in traffic, she stressed about the day’s work ahead of her. No matter what she did, she could never get all of her work done in time, and on the off chance she did finish her paperwork, she would only be given more. She hated the endless cycle of mindless work. Often she wished for something more, but it never came. She arrived at the familiar building and sighed as she looked up at its enormous façade because she knew there was no escaping the repetitive cycle that was her life. However, someone had once told her that everything happens for a reason and she decided to trudge on through this mundane life and wait for the unexpected to happen.
“Holly?” Someone called from behind her.
“Yes?” She answered, and so it began, just another ordinary day of waiting for something extraordinary to happen.
hopeful